Harrigan Tales

For those wondering… there have been no lost blocks yet this week.  I realize it is only Wednesday but I will take what I can get.  But let me tell you about the second part of this story that didn’t occur until Monday. 

I went to pick Walker up from Kindersmiles.  I was intercepted by the executive director.

"Oh, I am so glad I ran into you today."  She said with a smile and perkiness that could send you into a tizzy.  I thought to myself this can’t be good.

"Well… we have a new teacher today and all of the kids were testing her in every which way they could."  I felt a little relieved that he wasn’t alone in his task of testing the teachers.

"I said what were they doing?"  Apparently Walker and his best friend Timmy were being silly.  Normally I don’t think this is a problem and had to bite my tongue in order not to smile and at least pretend that I was taking her seriously.

"I had to take Walker and his friend Timmy into my office to talk with them."  I nodded in acknowledgment of what she was saying. 

Apparently the silliness got to the point that the boys were being a little disrespectful to the teacher.  Okay… I get it.  So anyways as the story unfolds she explained that after about ten minutes of talking to the boys in her office she decided that she lost the battle.  She gave up.  Ha… a little smile came to my face.  The boys were feeding off of each other in their silliness.  So  even her perkiness was minimized at this point.  Again I am trying not to laugh.  She explained that she told the boys that she would be talking to their parents.  I let her know that we would be enforcing the no silliness rule if not appropriate at the time.

So the next step was to have the talk with Walker.  The conversation goes like this.

"Walker, I thought we talked about the no silliness rule."

"Well mommy… I wasn’t silly at school."

I have been officially outsmarted by a five year old.  That one hurts.  He got me on a technicality. 

 

Okay some of you may be wondering what I mean by my title. I have learned that there is a huge difference from pre-school to kindergarten. It isn’t just one year difference it is the warm and fuzziness of the teacher just doesn’t exist. They have a job to do and they are going to accomplish come he_ _ or high water. Pre-school is to get them acclimated to the school environment. Kindergarten starts the actual earning process. At a high rate of speed I might add. Apparently they think they will learn to add, subtract and fractions by the end of the year. Well good luck with that.

My son came home last week and said that he lost a block. Ummm… I said.

“What happened?” I asked.

“I was talking loud.” He said matter-of-factly.

“Well honey you know that you are in kindergarten now, and you have to pay attention to your teacher.”

“I know.”

“If you know this, why were you talking loud?”

“Because I wanted to.” Honesty doesn’t always get you where you want to be.

Okay… I can’t argue with honestly but… if that doesn’t work for me it sure isn’t going to work for a five year old.

Needless to say he got one block taken away but there was no note that came home from the teacher. He told me about this of his own free will. Thursday night his teacher calls me at home just after 9:00. I see the number come up on the caller I.D.. Panic mode has now set in. Why would she be calling me at home and after she knows Walker would be asleep? She was merely calling to let me know that Walker was selected to participate in the extended day kindergarten. Okay… I was able to breathe again. I told her how much Walker seemed to like school. She agreed but added that he likes to be silly in class. Of course she said it in that firm teacher voice of hers that can give even a 41-year old the chills. First thought was, “Well there are worse things he could be”. No I didn’t say that but just politely agreed. Before Walker went to school the next morning we had a chat.

“Walker, you know you have pay attention in school and not be silly during class.”

Now mind you he said he understood. I figured I did the responsible thing as the parent and had the discussion. End of conversation. I was pretty impressed with this until I came home this past Friday.

Husband says, “Walker lost two blocks today.” In case you were wondering this is not a good way to start the weekend. I immediately go into angry mode.

“WALKER!! Come down here.” Yes my angry voice kicks in.

“What?”

“Walker, I said come down here.”

“What happened in school today that you lost two blocks?”

“I dunno, ummm… let me think”. Visual – his eyes are looking up (because you know the answer is somewhere up there) with the finger tapping on the lower lip. Needless to say I was not amused.

“I think I was being loud.”

“Well… what else? You lost TWO blocks today.”

“I was telling secrets during music class.”

“Walker… you know you aren’t suppose to be loud and telling secrets during class don’t you?”

“Yeah.” We are working on making those “yeahs” into clear “yeses”. Obviously, this is a work in progress. To be in progress means we would have to be getting somewhere on this subject. Clearly this is not the case.

“Then why were you being loud and telling secrets?”

“Because I wanted to.” Visual – he is shrugging his shoulder at the same time.

Okay – he gets points for honesty. Needless to say the conversation continued to the point of tears. Tears on his behalf not mine. Remember I am still in parenting mode therefore I can say (without remorse) “Because I said so”. And yes people… it feels good.

We all want our children to behave and be mindful all the time but this can’t be achieved without bending the rules sometimes. Goals of adults and those of our children tend to be slightly different. This is not news to anyone. Our kids want to tell secrets and be loud whenever the mood hits them because you know… they want to. We, on the other hand want our children to behave because frankly it reflects on directly on us. Even as adults we want to be popular and head of the class and once we have children we achieve this through them. Yes we want our children to grow up and be successful because selfishly that means WE did a good job. Yes we want them to be successful… blah… blah… blah. My primary wish for my children is to be happy in whatever they choose to do in life. As long as their happiness does not involve breaking the law, I can live with that.

The story continued throughout the weekend as we practiced what he was going to say to his teacher when he saw her Monday morning.

“Walker, what are you going to say to Mrs. Teacher when you see her?”

“Sorry”.

“Walker, you need to tell her why you’re sorry”.

“Sorry I lost two blocks”.

Snicker from me as I replied, “No… I’m sorry you lost the two blocks but you are sorry because you were being loud and telling secrets”.

As of 6:45 this morning we were still practicing the apology. I signed the note and sent it back in his backpack. I have learned that negotiating with a five year old can be challenging because frankly they don’t play fair. They pull at the heart stings much too often and the tears seem to come in a very timely fashion. We all hope to learn something from this. Me… I have to admit that my children aren’t perfect and that is okay. Boy that is hard to say. Hopefully Walker has learned that being loud and telling secrets will lose him two blocks. In all fairness I only told him not to be silly in class.  Darn, he got me on that one.  And to think… he is only in his fourth week of school.

It is unbelievable that people show their ignorance right out there in front to be ridiculed.  How stupid can they be?  Well here’s a story for you.  There is a town in North Carolina that banned the wearing of any countries flag on September 11th 2007.  The reason is they couldn’t decide what flags could be worn and which ones shouldn’t. 

On the sixth anniversary of the Sept. 11 attacks, students at one high school were not allowed to wear clothes with an American flag.

Under a new school rule, students at Hobbton High School are not allowed to wear items with flags, from any country, including the United States.

Neptunus Lex was able to sum up my thoughts on this with one sentence.

Let me make this one very simple for you, supe: Kids can wear the flag of any country that gave them birth, freedom and opportunity.

Well said Lex.  There are more than a few that could learn a thing or two from you.

Since this story broke they have lifted the ban on wearing any flags on their clothing.  A little late… you think?

My older son has started kindergarten this year and the political correctness speeches have already begun.  Please people this is getting ridiculous.  To be truly politically correct don’t we have to teach our children everything about other cultures and countries?  The school board is limiting what they will teach our children.  We send our children to school to get an education.  The true meaning of education is (and yes I looked it up):  The act, process, or art of imparting knowledge and skill.  I don’t see anywhere is there that it says we should pick and choose what we teach them.  By teaching our children other cultures they will grow to be compassionate and respectful to others.  By not teaching them I believe that we are limiting them before they even begin.